


Breathing Room

by lookninjas



Series: Children's Work [18]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, American Politics, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-13
Updated: 2018-01-13
Packaged: 2019-03-08 09:26:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13455342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lookninjas/pseuds/lookninjas
Summary: She isn't alone, not really.  There's just too much time to think.





	Breathing Room

**Author's Note:**

> For the prompt: "Ben visiting Rey at college? "
> 
> TIMELINE NOTES: This takes place during February/March of 2017, which I’m pretty sure would be Rey’s last semester of undergrad. Rey is still in the apartment in Ann Arbor, but basically everyone else is currently living in Detroit (Finn is teaching; Ben has moved in with Poe [and they just got married]). The original version in my head was going to have a little bit of plot! and some resolution! and then I sat down to write it and the story went no. I apologize for that.
> 
> (Also, as much as I’d like to be writing the AU where the 2016 elections didn’t go that way and AU Hillary is totally ruling the AU political scene – I just can’t. So it’s as bad there as it is here. Sorry.)

He’s cleaned.

Not much; there isn’t much to clean in the first place, because Rey isn’t home that much. She’s home more than she was – now that the wedding is over, and the March, and her speech, now that Poe’s not practically living out of Detroit Metro getting a crash course in immigration law, now that the first explosive panic of it all has died down, she’s actually home most nights. Works at her own kitchen table. Sleeps in her own bed. Wakes up and can make as much noise as she wants to, without worrying about someone else’s sleep. Doesn’t have to share a shower.

It’s awful. 

It isn’t – it shouldn’t be. There isn’t a good reason for it to be. Finn is there most weekends anyway. She still has Kaydel, and Peazey, and everyone else. Ben and Poe are never more than a phone call away. Han, Hux, Chewie, Lando –

She knows she’s not alone.

She doesn’t even feel alone, not really.

It’s just there’s so much time to think. Not even that much – not if she wants to graduate in May, and she’s already lost so much time to all of the… the everything happening all at once, but. More than there was.

Too much.

When she’s working, when she’s in bed, when she’s getting up, when she’s in the shower. She thinks too much, then.

There’s a joke there, about Plutt, about Plutt being right after all, that she still isn’t ready to make.

It doesn’t matter. Ben’s here. His coat is hanging by the door, his shoes are lined up underneath. Everything smells like onions and thyme. And he’s cleaned – he’s picked the junk mail out of the heap on the coffee table, leaving a neat stack of envelopes that Rey can’t bring herself to contemplate, cleared last night’s wine glasses away. He’s dusted, probably. Vaccuumed.

Like he’s trying not to think too much.

“Rey?”

She looks up, sees him standing in the doorway of the kitchen – she saw him eight days ago, they went out to dinner, nothing has changed since then there isn’t time but –

He crosses the living room in long strides, reaching out, and she folds into him, and he wraps around her.

The world isn’t ending; she knows the world isn’t ending, there’s too much left to do. It’s just – God – she’s tired.

She buries her face in his shirt, clutches it in both hands, holds on for dear life.


End file.
